


Take the heart of stone

by manekineko77



Category: Naruto
Genre: Inspired by iZombie (TV), M/M, Modern AU, not half as serious as it sounds, zombie!Kakashi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-30 19:19:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19409731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manekineko77/pseuds/manekineko77
Summary: Kakashi thought his heart dead to emotions for years, he even joked how suited he was for a zombie – invulnerability could only be an asset, in his line of work. Until Iruka touched his heart again.





	Take the heart of stone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WithYourRhythm](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WithYourRhythm/gifts).



> For WithYourRhythm, based on the requests: Zombie AU, Modern AU, kinkitsuroi (more beautiful for being broken). Somehow, the story idea managed to encompass all of the requests, I hope you like it! Inspired by iZombie TV show, and blackkat’s shipping of Sakumo/Orochimaru.  
> Big thanks to my beta Anna Halfway for invaluable advice, and to KakaIru exchange organizers for, well, organizing the exchange.

Basement level corridors in the OTO University Biology Department building were pleasantly cool in the unseasonably boiling June midday, and as gloomy and foreboding as ever. It being Saturday, the corridors were also quite deserted, although not many people ventured down there during the week, either. As far back as Kakashi could remember, students and assistants were reluctant to breach professor Kusanagi’s domain, and fellow professors avoided both the man and “his” basement as much as possible. The professor didn’t seem to mind, enjoying the freedom from frivolous work his dubious reputation and tenured status gave him. Occasionally Kakashi wondered how much of his own distant and solitary character was due to lifelong interactions with this man, but he couldn’t for a moment regret having had someone to rely on after his father’s untimely death.

Reaching the Herpetology lab, Kakashi rapped the usual sign and peeked through the door: “I’m here, Oro!”

“Come on in!” was the reply, and Kakashi strolled between the benches, glancing over the cages with the test subjects (and the food for the test subjects), a couple of microscopes, scattered labware and tidily marked bottles and boxes. Not very crowded at the best of times, the lab was empty save for a single figure seated by the dissection bench. Professor Orochimaru Kusanagi pushed away from the bench and rose to meet Kakashi, taking off and dumping his disposable gloves.

Although he was nearing his sixties, Orochimaru looked as timeless as ever, barely changed from the mysterious oriental beauty Kakashi’s father introduced more than two decades ago. Sakumo was thoroughly amused by their wariness, but soon the man and the boy settled into a mutual understanding. Kakashi was relieved not to be treated as a baby (he was almost six, after all!) and Orochimaru was always ready to answer the myriad of questions, with a mixture of patience and silent amusement. Less than three years later, it was in Orochimaru’s clumsy embrace that Kakashi could finally wail out his furious grief over Sakumo’s death.

“Aren’t you overdressed for the weather?” Orochimaru quirked an eyebrow at Kakashi, clad in boots, thick black pants and a jacket.

“You know I don’t sweat anymore.” Or feel the heat, Kakashi didn’t add. Sometimes, his condition had its advantages.

Orochimaru hummed and turned to a fridge standing in the corner of the lab. “I’ve prepared booster shots for your team.” He handed Kakashi three bubble-wrapped multi-injectors. “They can stand ambient temperatures for an hour or so, but I’ll give you a cooler too, weather being what it is.”

Kakashi inspected the injectors while Orochimaru rummaged beneath a bench to unearth a small cooler, stuffing it with frozen packs. “I see you’ve marked them?” Kakashi asked.

“You should know by now that dosage matters. The lightest of your team is less than half the mass of the heaviest. And this-” Orochimaru continued, bringing out a much larger multi-injector “-is for your companion. Mr. Umino, wasn’t it?”

Kakashi lurched to take the injector away from Orochimaru. “Give Iruka that shot? It’ll kill him, it almost killed Gai…!” Orochimaru stepped in front of Kakashi, keeping the injector away from his grasp, and placed a hand on his chest.

“Gai was already bitten when I administered that shot, and that was the first version, with purely animal antibodies. Thanks to him and the rest of your team graciously cooperating in the research, this is the fourth version, and it has already been tested on a naïve subject.”

“Successfully.” Orochimaru added when Kakashi’s wild gaze remained on the injector. “Kakashi. Trust me. I wouldn’t do anything to threaten your heart.”

Kakashi’s gaze turned vacant. “I don’t have a heart anymore. Not since…” the Incident. Not since he lived when his friends did not. Orochimaru lifted his hand to cradle Kakashi’s scarred cheek. Kakashi inclined his head to look into Orochimaru’s eyes. Since when was he taller than Orochimaru? In his memories he was looking up to Orochimaru as he held Kakashi’s hands and told him again and again that the deaths were not Kakashi’s fault, that he didn’t kill his friends.

Words were not necessary this time. Eventually Kakashi stepped away from Orochimaru’s touch, allowing him to package the large injector together with the three smaller ones. Closing the cooler, Orochimaru continued with the instructions. “Since this is the first shot, it will have to be administered to one of his gluteal muscles instead to his biceps. It will cause some spasming and residual soreness, but it shouldn’t impede his movements.”

Kakashi took the cooler and wondered how much of that was innuendo. Orochimaru thankfully stayed out of Kakashi’s private affairs, but he zeroed in on increasingly regular mentions of Iruka Umino with all the intensity of a viper spotting an unsuspecting mouse. Kakashi knew better than try and reply, so he just muttered his thanks and turned to leave.

“Ah-ah, one more thing!” Orochimaru offered him a huge and jolly pink smoothie. “You’ll need all your wits about you for tomorrow, and my guess is you haven’t eaten recently.”

“No, I’m clean”. The effects of a meal lasted for a week, give or take, and the flashbacks and parasitic emotions could be a drag. Kakashi couldn’t afford them before a mission. He gave the smoothie a sniff: forest fruits, banana, milk… “What did you add?”

“The usual: snake, rat…” Orochimaru looked at him askance as he added “and monkey”. Kakashi furled his nose in disgust. “I know you hate monkey, but you cannot argue with the results!” Orochimaru chided.

Indeed, Kakashi couldn’t. With a sigh, he downed the smoothie.

. o O o .  


Smells in the changing rooms of the Special Assault and Tactical Squad sector reminded Iruka strongly of his time in the military. Sweat, oil, metal, synthetics… adrenaline. Iruka’s heart rate had risen and he sweated slightly, but it was far from the floating panicky feeling he had only five weeks back, when Hinokuni Daily offices were invaded by a group of terrorists. Then, he was taken by surprise, unequipped, helpless against an unknown threat to those closest to him. Now, he was briefed, given the best equipment an embedded journalist could hope to receive, and in the company of veteran SATS squad. Insane as it was, Iruka wasn’t scared or even apprehensive. He was elated.

The elation was without a doubt partly caused by the commander of the squad. Captain Hatake had finished checking up with the rest of his team and was now approaching Iruka, inspecting his equipment with an expert eye. Unconsciously, Iruka straightened in a parade stance as he greeted him. Hatake tested that Iruka’s armour was fastened properly, quirked a silent eyebrow at the knife fastened on Iruka’s thigh, and laid his hand on Iruka’s shoulder.

“There’s still time to change your mind, Umino.” He told him seriously.

“It was my reporting on Accelerated Idiopathic Rabies Syndrome that started all this. I should be there at the end.” After a pause, Iruka added “Thank you for letting me join you.”

“Mah, you haven’t let your military training go rusty since the discharge, Sergeant. If you could keep up with Gai and Itachi on the training grounds, you should be fine.”

Iruka blushed a bit at the perceived praise, and then a bit more at the intense look Hatake seemed to give him. He patted Iruka’s shoulder and turned away to call the team together. Iruka rubbed his butt-cheek, recalling Hatake’s embarrassment yesterday, as he explained the injector use to Iruka. Iruka was well aware of what the routine of squats did for his butt and thighs, so he was smugly pleased by the impression they left on the sexy, mysterious, and a tiny bit undead Kakashi Hatake.

After all, turnabout was fair play. Iruka had never expected to fall in love with a zombie, and he was determined to overcome the barriers Hatake… Kakashi kept erecting. Especially since the man himself had seemed much less reserved and defensive in the immediate aftermath of Hinokuni attack, as he interrogated Iruka about the details of his investigations and his possible connections with certain members of the terrorist group.

Evidently Iruka had served together with one of them, a certain Touji, not that Iruka remembered much about him. It did explain why a terrorist would rant at Iruka about finally getting what he deserved instead of simply shooting him dead or trying to find out Iruka’s sources for the AIRS story. In turn, that gave the SATS squad  – their lithe and lethal captain in particular  – enough time to flatten the man and rescue Iruka.

Iruka hadn’t fallen in love then. Nor when his rescuer approached him afterwards, removing his mask and goggles to reveal an impossibly handsome face. It was when he squatted next to shock-blanket wrapped Iruka to put a comforting hand on his shoulder and inform him of exact number and conditions of casualties of the attack, and then patiently waited for Iruka to stop crying before asking him anything.

It was partly the infatuation and partly the need to solve the mystery behind the attack on his newspaper which motivated Iruka to share all he knew with Kakashi. His SATS team was the spear-tip of a special investigative force dealing with the strange spread of AIRS, Accelerated Idiopathic Rabies Syndrome – which, as Iruka’s source indicated and Kakashi confirmed, was not simply a deadly and highly contagious disease, but a result of a project to produce super-soldiers, impervious to injuries and with superior reflexes.

The project was terminated when AIRS first spread outside the research compound some five years back, but it seems an underground organisation has retaken the reins. The terrorist attack gave the investigators precious clues to the organisation’s whereabouts, and after a month of intensive investigation they were ready to go in and face the zombies… the AIRS-enhanced soldiers.

. o O o .

Kakashi was uneasy before the mission, and he had no doubts why. His team was small but deadly, perfectly balanced in their skills and team-work. He trusted Gai, Yuugao and Itachi to come through against any odds they might face. But Iruka… in his mind, he knew Iruka was capable. Sgt. Umino’s rise through the army ranks was followed by numerous commendations, and his discharge was solely due to a debilitating back injury. Gai was positively touched when he explained the determination and will-power needed to recover so completely.

But in his heart… Kakashi couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to Iruka. At first, he ascribed the strange fascination with the young man to the spill-over from the terrorist who knew him (was obsessed with him, judging from the flashbacks). Loath as Kakashi was to eat human brains since Orochimaru had perfected the animal-brain substitute, he volunteered to sample all of the terrorists in order to trace their organisation. But even after the effects of the brain ingestion ended, Kakashi found himself returning to Iruka again and again.

It still came as a shock to Kakashi when Iruka had smiled and leaned in to kiss him. Just a chaste press of the lips, but the eyes promising much more until Kakashi pushed him away.

“You can’t…” he muttered, and as Iruka’s face clouded he added “I can’t.” He should have let Iruka leave then, sever that hopeless connection, but he couldn’t bear to watch his dejected back.

“Iruka!” That was the first time he called his name. “It’d be too dangerous!” At Iruka’s bewildered look, he finally explained “I have AIRS.”

Iruka just stood and gaped for a moment, but then strode back to Kakashi and reached to touch him. When Kakashi made no move to prevent him, he caressed his cheek and finally rested his fingers just above his clavicle.

“I thought you had cold fingers …” Iruka whispered. After several seconds he added “There really is no pulse…” He lifted his searching gaze to Kakashi’s flinty face to finally ask “How?”

So Kakashi explained that AIRS could be managed if one had a steady supply of brains to keep one from going full “zombie”, as AIRS victims were dubbed almost immediately. But he was still as contagious as a rabid zombie, capable of transmitting AIRS through any of his bodily fluids. Even saliva.

“Even tears?” Iruka asked, and Kakashi wanted to cry even as he answered “I never cry anymore.” He thought his heart dead to emotions for years, he even joked how suited he was for a zombie – invulnerability could only be an asset, in his line of work. But first Gai had slowly chipped away at his walls, and now this man had taken a wrecking ball through them. One hit was all it took, as Iruka enveloped Kakashi in his arms. Letting go was impossible now.

Even if that meant risking to lose his heart again. Kakashi glanced at Iruka, adjusting his helmet and checking his recording device. Noticing, Iruka smiled back at him and then determinedly looked ahead. Taking a deep breath, Kakashi lowered his mask and commanded “Move out!”

. o O o . 

**Epilogue, because the author can’t write action scenes if Iruka’s life depended on it.**

Monday morning dawned refreshingly cool, after the rainstorm on the Sunday afternoon. Orochimaru didn’t mind the heat, but he enjoyed the smells of greenery after the rain and enthusiastic birdsong as he made his first cup of tea. The doorbell distracted him from his reverie, and he was mildly surprised to see Kakashi at his threshold.

“You are just in time, I have freshly steeped tea” he offered Kakashi a cup, and the two of them sat sipping on the balcony. Kakashi seemed pensive but unharmed after yesterday’s action. The evening news had reported on the explosions and the ensuing fire in the Akatsuki industrial compound, and he received a terse message from Kakashi JOB DONE, ALL FINE. But apparently, Kakashi needed to expand on that. Orochimaru waited patiently for Kakashi to start.

He almost choked on his tea when Kakashi’s first words were “It was Obito.” Kakashi turned the cup in his hands. “He didn’t die that day with Rin. Rather, he died, but was ‘brought back’. He was AIRS patient zero.” Orochimaru leaned back and sighed in understanding. “What they did to him… for years, what they kept doing to him…” Kakashi ran his hands through his hair and then straightened up to finish the report.

“When the project was discontinued in 2014, they were supposed to destroy him. He wasn’t so lucky… Prof. Senju’s widower was determined to continue and perfect his husband’s work, so he took Obito as well as most of the notes. That’s why there wasn’t enough of the material there for you to develop a cure for me.” As much as Orochimaru had tried.

Orochimaru had thought he had his darkest years behind him, when he lost the only man who could love him despite all his shortcomings. But facing the possibility of losing the son, his son, to an unconquerable disease… Orochimaru barely slept that year, until he and Kakashi learned at least how to manage AIRS, how to “live” with it.

“Obito became aware of what was happening, some years back. There was less medication to keep him under, and they believed him to be cooperative. So when we found…” Kakashi’s voice broke, and he buried his face in his palms. Orochimaru stroked his bent back as he continued through the sobs “… he fought them, it was he that… that set off the explosion.” With a deep breath, Kakashi straightened up again. “He took them down with him. He’s finally at peace.”

“And…” Kakashi turned to Orochimaru with a pained smile, “he left me a present.”

. o O o .

Iruka usually didn’t mind hospitals, but he was decidedly bored now. He was visited in the morning first by Gai (bearing a humongous bouquet of sunflowers) and then by Naruto (bearing ramen, which, yeah!). Then he was prodded and poked again, his shoulder rebandaged and tutted at. He had all sorts of lines and sensors reattached and was ordered not to move. He’d had the anti-AIRS shot, and the bite had barely broken the skin, dammit, he was fine!

He was faintly disappointed not to have seen Kakashi all day. Granted, the man had hovered like a particularly agitated bumble-bee before being shooed away by the first aid team, and then again when Iruka was settled in the hospital for the night. It was Iruka who shooed him off that time, demanding that he rest and let Iruka rest, and so Kakashi slunk off, hopefully to sleep. Did zombies need sleep? He’d have to ask next time.

Iruka was just drifting off into another nap when he heard a door close, and opened his eyes to see Kakashi, in civvies, creep closer to his bed.

“Hey” he smiled at Kakashi, “where have you been?”

“I went to see Orochimaru.”

“Good.” Kakashi needed some familial support after the shock he had yesterday. Iruka found out about Obito from Gai this morning, and the story broke his heart. Iruka entwined his fingers with Kakashi’s. “Are you OK?”

Kakashi was silent for a while, and Iruka tightened his hold. Then he flashed a fake smile at Iruka; “You know the package we found in the freezer?” They were retreating from the flames when Kakashi ducked into a storage space to rummage in a freezer and bring out a plastic bag full of vials. “Obito collected samples of his blood, tissue and saliva. I asked Oro, and those could be the components he was lacking to develop a cure.”

“To cure AIRS?” Iruka gasped. “To cure you?”

“I imagine there are other functional zombies around, but yes, to cure me.” He smiled more sincerely this time. “You know, until a couple of months ago, I’d say that I did not need a cure. An undead SATS-ie is much more efficient, after all.”

“Why didn’t you infect your teammates, then, if that’d improve their performance so much?” Iruka grinned at Kakashi.

Kakashi lifted Iruka’s hand to kiss it. “Because there’s life after work, and I couldn’t take that away from them.”

Iruka was grinning so hard his face hurt. “After you’re cured, I’m taking you out to ramen.”

“I’m looking forward to it.” Kakashi smiled back.

Then they were interrupted by Naruto who brought more ramen, but it’s all for the best. Detaching the lines and accidentally exchanging fluids would get them in so much trouble.


End file.
